My Online FemDom experience.

Submitting to a man was always one of my fantasies since I can recall, that’s how I discovered my sexuality, perhaps that is what I thought sex was supposed to be, men are physically stronger, there was no doubt of that for me. When I started my journey as a CamGirl I didn’t understand many things, one of them was the desire some men had for a woman to take control. To be honest it felt wrong just hearing about such a thing.

I met a guy in February 2015, let’s call him “Steve”, he was always very generous, funny and polite, a good looking guy around my age that was finishing his college degree. We became great friends and after a few months of close friendship we met in person, he came to visit me in Colombia. I wasn’t after a romantic relationship at the time and he was ok with that, we hung out and he would literally fill my house with really expensive presents, top brand cameras, fancy jewelry, perfumes, you name it. He literally put the world at my feet, knowing nothing will happen between us.

Steve never crossed any lines, he was a giver, never a taker. I had strong feelings for him, sometimes he would take me on a Private Show (is one of those things on camsites, when guys pay per minute so they have the girl for themselves without distractions) he would want me to call him names… naughty names. I got blurry memories of him holding his credit card with his mouth and being on his knees for me to see him on the webcam, I don’t know for sure if that was his idea or mine, but I remember clearly laughing and trying to hide it. I enjoyed telling Steve what to do: stripping for me, dancing and being available almost 24/7 but what got me off the most was stopping him from pleasing himself while he was watching me, he wasn’t allowed to play, just watch. It was an amazing experience, something that happened naturally but didn’t last long. After a few months, Steve and I stopped talking, I still remember him, his smile and the way he made me feel. It took me years to realized that Steve was into something I didn’t understand at the time, that now became my biggest turn on in the world: Female Domination.

It was the middle of March 2017 when I met Mathew, he seemed very generous, especially on nights when we were drinking. Shots here, shots there, dancing and fun, I was pretty shocked seeing the amount of tokens he would spend with me after a few drinks, but nothing really strange happened for a couple of months. We were just getting to know each other, but if I’m completely honest in those days I started to discover a new side of me, I became bossy. That’s the word… BOSSY!

One night after a few drinks I started commanding Mathew to do things for me, it happened effortlessly. I asked him to buy me drinks that I sell for 500 tokens (about $50), he just couldn’t say no to me. That night he did exactly EVERYTHING I wanted him to and to be honest, it turned me a lot having that kind of power over a man I haven’t even touched. The more we drank the more wild I got, I wanted to cause him pain, I still don’t know why, my whole goal was to make him regret that night forever. He spent over $4000 with me that night and I can assure you he didn’t regret it. I wanted him to be mine, I kept saying it. We went on with these games for a few months. The truth is a part of me was feeling worried and guilty about the amount of money he was spending. We never reached that point of confidence and trust that is needed for this type of relationship.

We talked about setting boundaries a few times, he wanted me to write a contract for our relationship but I didn’t know what I was doing, so nothing came of that. Things started to feel awkward for me but we kept going. He had some interesting sex toys at home that I’d ask him to use at certain times. I was very unsure of everything, I didn’t know much about this person and started to feel uncomfortable with everything going on. In the end, the lack of communication became more evident. It didn’t take long for things to fall apart and we both moved on with our lives, I just began to think this whole domination thing wasn’t for me, but overall it was an interesting experience.

I kept doing my regular cam days, going with the flow and almost forgot about what happened with those guys. During September 2018 Amador came to my life. He’s one of those guys with the super power of bringing the best out of people, it didn’t take long for us to become close friends, he was always fun and respectful in my chatroom, everyone liked him. My face would brighten up every time I saw him online. He was very special to me, I felt his wonderful energy since the first time we spoke and I owe him big time because he helped me get out of a hole during a bad time.

One night while I was online I started asking him questions, those that know me well are aware of my curiosity. I wanted to know about his sex life and I noticed the vibe changed. Amador confessed he’s never been in a conventional relationship his whole life, he always paid for pleasure and never admitted that to anyone. I could tell he was embarrassed to admit he has been with prostitutes in the past, but if you ask me, I was beyond fascinated. I liked him even more and my curiosity kept growing.

After that day our connection became stronger, I could see through him, he could see through me, it was wonderful. I started to notice some behavior in him, it was obvious he liked to be dominated. One night during one of my shows I secretly commanded him when and how to orgasm, making him edge for a while… it really turned me on knowing he was following my instructions, we both released at the same time. It felt amazing and I wanted more. At that point there was no doubt in me I wanted to own him,  –“be mine”-, I told him. Amador has never been owned by a woman before and the whole idea was getting us both off.

I want to clarify I don’t have much knowledge about this domination thing, he didn’t either so we promised each other to figure things out together. There’s a limit on the amount of things you can do from a distance, especially when I’m online. Everything started slow, while I was streaming I’d  hesitate to ask him to buy a certain amount of tokens, I wanted to test him, but after my experiences in the past, I felt insecure. He meant too much as a friend to mess things up. I remember shaking, feeling my heart race, and my hands sweating after saying –“buy 200 tokens”-. I know some of you might think it’s about getting extra money, but it’s not that simple, it’s all about taking control and him trusting enough to know I will never do anything that gets him in trouble. Sometimes he would take a while to do a token purchase and I would die with anxiety until I saw the tokens in his account. I’m sure he had his doubts at first too but we manage to communicate properly and set boundaries on time.

We went on with our little games for a while, every time I increased the amount of tokens I wanted him to buy, as I denied him pleasure for days. I begged him many times to let me see him on the webcam, but he kept saying he was a very shy man. A few weeks passed and I was developing feelings for a guy I’ve never seen. One night he surprised me, he opened his webcam and he was wearing one of those BDSM masks. That’s when I felt it was real, we needed to set financial boundaries.

Asking Amador how much money he made per week felt strange, but besides the fun I wanted him to stay out of trouble financially. I care for him. I started setting up some rules, asked him to start dividing his money and to be more organized with his finances, but he gave that power to me. He opened a PayPal account where I have control of how much he spends and how he spends it. Every day he puts into that joint account 2.6% of his salary, adding up to a 79% per month (that amount was entirely his choice). I’m the only person allowed to spend it, this includes a monthly allowance I send him for good behavior or purchase of sex toys.

Amador took his role extremely serious and wrote down a 10 pages contract with the terms of our new relationship. It really freaked me out at first, it seemed like so much work I almost pulled out a few times, I was literally in control of his life. Amador made it easy for me, he did his homework well. It took us about a month to come out with the right contract, we both changed and discussed things over the days. I wanted to make sure he was ok with my demands and everything fit us both perfectly.

Since October 28th I own him officially, in a way I have never owned anyone before. He’s mine but I’m not his, he knows his place, never asks for anything from me and addresses me as Mistress while I address him as pet. We’re both learning together. Every command that comes out of my mind he does immediately just to please me, which raised my confidence to ask for more every time, it stopped being about money/tokens. Some days I don’t even ask him to give me $1, instead I want him to do chores around his house. Amador admitted he had troubles hoarding for many years, I wish you guys could see how amazing his room looks now or how much weight he has lost since we met. He admitted he is a better person because of me and I can 110% guarantee I’m a better person because of him. In a way, I’m the one in charge of his personal care and I love it.

Our sessions over the internet got more intense every time, it surprises me the things a man can do to please a woman, I got him wearing a cock cage that he takes off only by command, I guess that’s one of the things I like the most, that he can feel me all the time with him. He’s always waiting for me before I get online and has never failed at performing a task. His love and devotion keeps growing stronger and I gotta admit I love pushing his limits, by now we have a wonderful collection of toys that I’m afraid to mention here, but I assure you I never knew there was so much pleasure in pain.

Amador has really expanded my mind and the way I see the world, he gives me confidence and during stressful times, he’s there as a friend to lift my spirits. We agreed to never have any personal contact at the beginning of our journey and words fail to express my gratitude for all he’s done knowing nothing is going to pass this point.

I never thought I could care this much for a person and make them do the kind of things I make Amador perform for me. I’m afraid you guys are not ready for the freak that lives inside of me but I promise I will share more about this adventure in a future post.